Coaching Call – Transformation Challenge Week 9: Cravings
Hello, everyone. Thank you so much for being with us. We are in week nine of our NewYou90 challenge, and it is all about cravings this week. I hope you enjoyed allergens last week. I hope you learned a lot and are now able to navigate your way through those foods and food sensitivities that may have blocked you in the past. And now you are set free to this next step that we are at, which is all about cravings. Cravings can be seen as an enemy sometimes. Cravings can seem as just this big giant that interferes in your life and we’re so afraid to face it. Because when we have a craving, we’re afraid we’re going to go overboard. I want to let you know that that doesn’t have to happen. It doesn’t. Because cravings are really a friend. Cravings let us know what’s missing in our life. What we need to tap into in our life in order for us to be more grounded with food and for us to feel more nourished by food versus the stress and fear of it and the tug of war about it. This week I want you to take this lesson and go through the email that I sent you, the newsletter, the NewYou90 newsletter that I sent you that will describe every aspect of cravings. And you can walk through each individual piece of it and learn about your cravings, so that you know how to walk with them the rest of your lives because they really can be a friend.
All right. So, hello, everyone. I’m so glad y’all here. This is a fantastic night. I am going to share my screen with you now, so that you can see the presentation and we can get moving right along with this fabulous topic. Let’s first talk about announcements. There are no announcements other than our live Q&A on Thursday. These Q&As happen on the Facebook page, the NewYou90 Mannatech Facebook page. I do it on that page so that those who are in the challenge, those who are part of that group, and who have participated in this will have access to these Q&As and be able to hop on anytime and ask a question. So, remember, when these are Q&As on Facebook, in the Facebook Group NewYou90 Mannatech, that means that I am showing up on a live video. There is no link you go to other than in your notifications. When Facebook sends you a notification, it will say Ashley Torin is now live at NewYou90 Mannatech. Whoo! [Laughs] And that is where you click on that notification and it is going to take you live. You can also go straight to NewYou90 Mannatech Facebook Group and be able to tap onto the live screen there.
All right. Two ways that you can send me questions is info@ashlytorian.com and you can Facebook message me, Ashley Torian, Ashley Fredrick Torian. Both of those will get me the question that you have for the Q&A Thursday. Also, feel free to text me at 214-682-9867 if that’s the only way you can do it. Because I know sometimes we can’t get through on Facebook, so you need an alternative route and that is what that is. Okay. All right. Here we go.
Body Love Tip. If you determine your outcome with your past patterns and beliefs, it will happen that way, meaning your patterns around cravings do not have to own you. They do not have to determine what’s going to happen with your body, with your health, with your peace of mind, your mindset. Cravings do not run the show, unless we allow them to run the show. What I’m going to share with you tonight is going to totally free you from this pattern of craving. Because we want to walk this path with the cravings and know that they are here to help us. They are here to help us. That is always such a fun thing. We do have to be in a state of awareness. In the very beginning of this program, I talked with you about the importance of slow. If you will notice, I have brought up that in every single class. Because in every single tool that I’m teaching you, it’s vitally important that you’re in this place of slow. Slow is where the action is. Slow is where magic happens. Slow is where you are going to see a craving, and you are going to be able to dissect it and figure out what kind of craving that it is, but it only takes place when we are slow in an awareness. This is another very important place where you can practice slow. There are three types of cravings. One is Supportive. This is when the body instinctively yearns for a food that enhances your nourishment, enhances your health, enhances a healing process. It can fulfill an emotional need or void, or it neutralizes an imbalance. Now I sent you a Cravings Guide in the NewYou90 newsletter this week. That NewYou90 newsletter comes from me. It’ll say from Ashly Torian, so that you can immediately recognize it.
There is a link for Cravings Guide. And this Cravings Guide is awesome. It helps you to see where your salty craving if you’re craving a salty food, a sweet food, a bitter food, a pungent food. If you’re craving ice, if you’re creating cold food, hot food, light food, heavy food, creamy food, it will describe to you where the deficiency is. Also, it gives you food ideas so that you’re not going to chocolate as your go-to whenever you have a craving or a triple mocha latte or whatever it is that you have as your go-to craving. Sometimes we could be craving something that’s creamy and we go to chocolate automatically. Or we could be craving who knows what it could be, but we have go-tos. Have you noticed that? There’s a go to that whenever you’re feeling some kind of an emotional need, you automatically go to that food that you go to. Well, look through this list because you may be deficient in something, and it may help you and help curb the craving from showing up over and over again. So, check out the Cravings Guide.
The second type of craving is a Dispersive craving. Now this is the cravings that are not always good for us. If you are running all over the place, burning the candle at both ends, not getting enough sleep, you are stressed to the max because you have emotional stuff, you have business stuff, you have home stuff, whatever it is, you’re behind on things and you’re stressed. You are going through a drive through every day to help you stay awake, whether it’s that triple mocha latte, whether it is a chocolate bar, energy drinks, energy shots, whatever it is, if you have that within you to do that, then this is a dispersive craving. You’re hoping that if there’s that sense that we think, “Okay, if I can just have this, I’ll be okay and I’ll be awake enough to handle the next step.” Well, that is not always the case. It usually leaves us wanting and even more fatigued than we were before.
When we have dispersive cravings, it is time for us to get quiet. This is one of those moments where you go off by yourself and you have a quiet moment to deep breathe and just writing in your journal, pray, meditate, stretching or yoga or something that is more meditative and fluid. When we have dispersive cravings, this is when our body is saying, “You have run me to the max and I have to rest.” That’s what a dispersive craving is all about. When you have these, the ones that send you to get hooked up with some caffeine or chocolate or anything that makes you feel better, temporarily speaking, that is when it’s time for you to go, “No, I don’t think that’s going to do it for me this time. I need to rest. I need quiet.” And go give yourself that quiet.
The third type of craving is an Associative cravings. Now these can be fun. These cravings connect you to a meaningful experience you’ve had in your life. Associative cravings are like when you were a young kid and when you walked in from school, your mom was baking cookies and after school, that was a time that you could sit down, have a glass of milk and some cookies, and just let it all out. Talk to your mom, tell her what happened at school, just really decompress and just relax. If you’ve ever noticed when you’ve come home from work, and let’s say you just really need to decompress and you would love to go back to those days of milk and cookies with your mom and be able to just lay it all out on the counter with your mom while you’re eating her homemade cookies and milk, nothing beats that, right? There are days when you may come home from work and from meeting with a client, from meeting with an associate, whatever it is, and you smell that smell as you walk in the door but it’s not there, but it leads you to baking some cookies and to having some milk. That’s an associative craving. Craving it’s a yearning. Sometimes those are very much needed because they reconnect us. They ground us.
Associative cravings are not “bad” for us. Associative cravings can be very healthy, very nourishing, when they are utilized with wisdom, when they’re utilized without judgment or criticism, and when they’re utilized and followed through with love and with knowing, “Wow, this reconnects me.” Having that knowing that you’re connected again, that you’re grounded, that is fulfilling, nourishing and that’s when they are very, very healthy. So, watch out here though and make sure that you’re not abusing your associative cravings. There was a time when I abused my associative cravings of ice cream. Because when I was a young girl — you’ve heard me say this — celebration was ice cream. So, when I was in that struggle of pain and fear and just being terrified of food and where I was at with that relationship, ice cream made me feel better. I had ice cream almost every single day. Haagen-Dazs vanilla was my friend, and I began to abuse that associative craving, so I can connect back. And all of a sudden, that comfort and that connection that I had gotten from it before, it was kind of disappearing and I wasn’t receiving that beauty from it. I wasn’t receiving that comfort from it anymore. That’s what you want to watch out for on that one and that is it. Just make sure you are responsible with your associative cravings. You’re using wisdom. Okay? But that’s a fun one to experiment with. So, those are the three types of cravings.
I hope I was helpful in showing you that cravings are not bad. Cravings are helpful, very, very helpful for us. They let us know where we’re at and what’s happening in our life. The other side of cravings is something I want you to know about and that is, pleasure. When we spoke about pleasure a couple of weeks ago, I want you to understand that with that pleasure, if you eliminate that pleasure from your life, you’re going to crave even more. And it’s going to be the dispersive and the associative that you’re going to crave more than ever. Because pleasure has been eliminated from your life. So, do not eliminate pleasure. All right. There are two ways to process cravings. One is to minimize the intensity with an intuitive eating technique. This is when you’re asking questions of yourself. This is on the dispersive and on the associative and sometimes on the supportive as well. But it’s just for you to check in with it. So, when we use this technique we’re asking questions that are very helpful on us, figuring out if we really need that food right then, in that moment, in our life. The questions look like this. First, you want to recognize what’s happening. That’s what slow is about. We get an awareness. “I am going for that chocolate again that’s in my food bag. What’s happening with that?”
Now you want to just see it for what it is. Does it feed muscle or fat? Does the chocolate in my bag feed muscle or does it feed fat? In this moment, it’s my third time to grab the chocolate, so I would say at this point, it’s feeding fat. Next question, is this in alignment with my purpose, with what I’m wanting to achieve in this 90-day challenge? Is that really part of my goal, my purpose, my mission? No, it’s not. Number one because I’m blindly grabbing it. Number two because I’ve grabbed it for the third time in a row. Once I put it back in the bag, zipped up the bag, now I’m unzipping it for the third time. That’s showing me that there’s a pattern, that I’m avoiding something, right? Wouldn’t you agree with that? When you were jumping in towards a food for three times and you zip it up and you close it, and then you’re opening it up again to grab it again, there’s a pattern here. Something’s being avoided. No, it’s not in alignment with my purpose. If I’m avoiding something, I’m definitely not in alignment. Do I still want it? If it’s not in alignment and it’s feeding fat, do I still want to take in this food for a fourth time? Yes or no. If you answered no, then you went through your intuitive eating questions with confidence, with a queen type or king type presence. You know what’s good for you, what’s best for you, and you said, “Nope, don’t want any more,” and you put it away and you’re good. But what if you said, “Yes, I still want it.” There’s just this driving need. If you’re going to go ahead and have that food, then have it with pleasure and with love. There is no judgment or criticism about you going for it.
The only prerequisite I have is this. If you’re going to go for it again and you said, yes, you’re going to go ahead and have it, then you wait until you can be all in with that food. Taste, aroma, pleasure, satisfaction. You can eat it slowly. You can let that chocolate, for this example, melt on your tongue and you can savor the flavors and the texture of it. When you swallow it, you can still taste it in your mouth. It lands beautifully in your stomach. You take that deep breath of oxygen, so that the body continues to burn in a relaxed state, which means your thermogenic capacity is on fire. That is the prerequisite that if you do this intuitive eating technique and the answer is still yes, that you must ritualize the way you’re going to eat that food. Ritualizing, meaning it is done with flair. [Laughs] It’s done with fun. It’s done with pleasure and confidence in who you are as an eater. You’re not hidden. You’re not in avoidance. You’re not blinded. You’re in none of those places. It is with full awareness for what you’re doing. I guarantee you and I promise you that when you do it that way, it’s going to change the way you show up with that food the next time. It will totally change.
Now the second way we can process cravings. The second way we can process these cravings is to feel the craving, meaning this, when you begin to feel that craving that you are wanting the bag of cookies or that coffee, whatever it is that you’re craving, and you feel like you have little Pac-Man in your jaw and they’re just [Inaudible 00:19:00] [Laughs]. Just driving you to have that craving. I ask you to sit with it and to feel. What you do is you say, with your eyes open, “I feel this.” Close your eyes. Where do you feel it? Where do you feel this craving in your body? Do you feel the Pac-Man at the back of your jaws? Do you feel this gripping in your stomach? Do you feel a rush of blood flowing through your body? Notice that I mentioned all sensations that you can feel in your body. You just want to feel. If you begin to think and attach thoughts to these feelings that you’re having in your body, you will break the benefit of this exercise. You must cut off all thoughts to where all you do is feel these sensations. These sensations will flow through your body. About two-and-a-half minutes, that’s typically the lifespan of them. Sometimes it can go to five, especially if little thoughts keep bumping in, but if you do not allow those thoughts to flow in, then you can eliminate this sensation for that craving in your body in about two-and-a-half to three minutes. When that emotional current, that craving current is processed through your body, you just wait until it’s completely gone, and then you can open up your eyes and ask yourself, “Okay, do I still want that food? Am I still in a place where I need that food?” Typically, the answer is going to be no. I don’t need it anymore. So, those are two ways you can process your cravings. Spot on ways. They’re awesome. Beautiful, beautiful.
All right. Let’s move on to self-sabotaging behavior, within these cravings and around them and separate from them. The way we speak to our self can trigger these cravings. If your self-talk is negative which we’ve had a couple of negative-thought fast while we’ve been in this NewYou90 challenge. We’ve undergone a couple of those. You’ve been watching for those negative thoughts, that negative self-talk. Did you notice that whenever you spoke negatively to yourself it could send you to a craving or it could send you to an undesired eating behavior? We want to stop this. This week I want to help you turn around those negative thoughts, the negative self-talk that is coming at you. When you come in from the day, a negative thought or a negative self-talk statements could look like this, “I have had a hard day. I deserve this bowl of ice cream.” You can change to “I deserve some comfort tonight. So, what else could I have that would provide me comfort?” Remember the… No, we haven’t done that yet. All right. Coming soon, we are going to be stepping into energy and what gives us energy and comfort.
Comfort is kind of like energy. Make a list right now. What brings you comfort? What brings you comfort? What makes you feel good? What makes you feel like you just ate a bowl of ice cream with the cherry on top, without eating a bowl of ice cream with the cherry on top? What makes you feel warm and loved? Write those things down so you have them on you at all times, so that if you need comfort, then you can resort to that comfort list. I do deserve some comfort tonight. I am going to go take an Epsom salt bath and put plenty of frankincense in there and play some beautiful harp music and just breathe and put some candles on. Yes, comfort. I deserve some comfort. We can have comfort outside of food. We can experience comfort outside of food. There’s other ways, but food is typically the fastest. We can sit down and curl up and watch TV or wrap a blanket around us and enjoy it, but it doesn’t give us the comfort that we’re really looking for. That’s what we’re doing in this 90-day challenge is we are looking to see what other ways we can receive comfort and energy and vitality that’s not food. Because food is nourishment and we want another long list of things that can bring us the other and help us to be grounded and ready. There was another example in here. I already cheated with the piece of chocolate this morning. I might as well blow the whole day and start fresh tomorrow.
One bite doesn’t blow anything. A full bowl of ice cream doesn’t blow anything. You’re changing this to “I am making progress each day. I am doing this.” Because just think, before, you may have had that bowl of ice cream every single day. It’s been two months and now you’re having a bowl of ice cream. You didn’t blow anything. No. Never. We never blow anything. We experiment. We learn. We overcome. We learn to give ourselves some grace and to know that all is well all the time, no matter what. No matter what. You just get back on in the next moment. Remember, each moment is different not each day. Each day is different, but you don’t have to blow a whole day just because you ate this chocolate or had a bowl of ice cream or went through a drive-through a Taco Bell. You didn’t blow it. You learn from it. What was I craving? What kind of craving was that? You ask yourself questions, so that you can learn more about who you are as an eater. It’s so much fun.
All right. So, I love this picture this is one of my favorite pictures of the beetle inside the flower. Nothing can distract him, can’t it? Not right now and that is how you are in this 90-day challenge. You are going forth. You are practicing. You are experimenting. You are learning about yourself. When things pop up for you with cravings, with lack of pleasure, with stepping out of your body, and cutting off your mind-body connection, anytime you do things like that, you’re not being distracted and pulled off course. You are being given opportunities to learn more about yourself and who you are. So that you, after these 90 days, you know exactly what to do when you have a hiccup. Yes, these are all opportunities to practice. They’re not distractions. They’re not pulling you of course. They are keeping you accountable to what you’re doing. Yes, so exciting and so much fun. So much fun. Never look on these occurrences, hiccups, cravings, whatever it is that you feel is to be pulling you off course, it’s your opportunity, your biggest opportunity, to stay the course to learn about yourself so that you can keep going. As you are losing this fat weight, as you are getting down to the size that you’ve always wanted to be, you can stay there. You can stay there because you are the master of it. You are the queen. You are the king. Yes, love this. You are rocking it. I am so proud of you. I am so thrilled that you have stayed the course because you are getting energy from this. I can’t wait for our energy class. [Laughs] It’s in a couple more weeks. Energy is awesome. You can receive energy as you are walking through this craving list that I gave you, figuring out what cravings you have. You are going to fill yourself up with energy because you have taken away some mental stress. Reducing mental stress always builds us up, builds up our energy tank.
All right. Go out and have a great week nine. I am thrilled about this. I am so excited for you, and I am cheering you on each and every day. Have a wonderful week, everyone. I will check in with you on the Q&A on Thursday, NewYou90 Mannatech at 12 noon, central time. I will see you then. Bye, everybody.
Recorded and current as of March 4, 2019
Always consult with your physician or other qualified healthcare provider before embarking on a new diet or program. This program is not recommended for pregnant or lactating women. If you are taking medications, have a health condition or are planning a medical procedure, consult your health professional before beginning this program. It is also not recommended for children under the age of 18. If you have any specific questions about these matters, you should consult your doctor or other healthcare provider.