Coaching Call – Transformation Challenge Week 6: Pleasure (Video Transcription)
Hello, everyone. Welcome to week six of the NewYou90 challenge. You are doing so great, you are rocking it. You are standing up to the challenge, you are walking through it, you’re persevering, and I am so proud of you. So very proud of you, and so very proud to walk alongside you on your journey to living fit, healthy, vibrant, and full of vitality. That is a mouthful. [Laughs] But I am so glad that we are here together, being able to celebrate everything that you’ve done thus far. I know last week we had a little review week, going over the mind, body, nutrition protocols that you have done thus far, the cleanse days, the nourish days, the supplements, how you’re doing with all of that, the eating protocol, in general, with low-glycemic eating. You were able to check in and see where you are. I hope that you were able to look at that and celebrate the places where you have succeeded. Then, on those places where you would like to work a little bit more on or you don’t quite get the step, what it all entails, that you have dedicated some time to spend with that one protocol, one mind, body, nutrition element that will help you succeed even further. Because, remember, this is not about succeeding only in this moment, this is about setting the stage, laying the foundation for you to succeed in eating, exercise, behavioral issues with foods for the rest of your life. This is not about just these 90 days, it is about the rest of your life. That’s what we’re doing here, we are laying a solid foundation so that you have something to land on [Laughs] every single time a hiccup comes along because a hiccup will come along. But they won’t affect you like they did before because you are armed with all the tools you need and a thick, firm foundation so that you know exactly what to do when those hiccups occur and it won’t be any big deal. And you will be living free in a body that is fit, healthy, and vibrant. Sounds fun, doesn’t it?
All right. Welcome, everybody that’s been jumping on. So glad you are here. Hello. Hello, Susan, hello, Patty. Thanks, you guys, for being here. This week is one of my favorite weeks. I love this topic around pleasure. Pleasure is not typically partnered with weight loss, in the dieting world. However, in my world of fat loss and helping people with their behaviors, with foods, and also teaching them the wonderful elements of mind, body, nutrition, pleasure is a big part of it because what we have found is, is that when you feel restricted and like you can’t have anything that brings you pleasure, then you begin to take pleasure out of every area of your life and not just food, and it’s no fun, and people typically fail. Well, I don’t mean typically. Anytime you’re restricted, failure is really the only option there. In my programs, I teach to have pleasure integrated into your day. And pleasure is really fun. Pleasure is not found just in food. It is found in so many areas of your life, and it’s a matter of looking for those areas so that you can add pleasure in so that you are fully there in your life and loving the process of it, loving the process of watching the fat melt away. Yes, this is what we’re doing. Hello, Karen, so glad you’re here tonight. Welcome, welcome. Whoever else has jumped on, welcome, so glad you’re here. All right. So, are you ready to get started? Let’s get started.
Let me share my screen with you so that you can receive the really good information that we have for this evening. Be thinking in your mind when was the last time that you experienced pleasure. Think about that. All right. Let’s see here. For some reason, it is not… There we go. [Laughs] All right. So, I’m going to make myself disappear. Okay. Whoops. Oh, the whole screen went black. Here we are. We’re back, I think. Not really. Okay, here we are. [Laughs] If we have any technical difficulties tonight, please bear with me. If something happens and I’m dropped, I will jump back on. So, just hang tight, and I’ll come back into the webinar room, all right? So, we’re in week six, and this is all about finding your prrr factor. Wow, your prrr factor. When was the last time you felt a prrr in your system? Now, this is a really good question. When was the last time you allowed yourself a prrr when it came to the food you ate? Or did you just eat on autopilot? Now that you have been going slow and you’ve been introduced to the power of slow, you may have had some hints of prrr factor with your food, new dishes you’ve tried, “Oh, this is so good,” right? I know that I find my prrr factor quite frequently with my food. There are just certain things on my palette that just… They just bring out the prrr. That is very important, to find that in food because, typically, our relationship with food is one of a love/hate relationship, one of, “I can’t depend on food because it has gotten me in this situation so I’m not going to find enjoyment out of it.” That’s typically the mindset around food when it comes to those who have struggled with their weight, struggled with being the same size their whole life, struggled with their health. It’s just food is just a means to an end. Well, but food is vitally important in our life. Food is what grounds us. Food is a foundation in our life. And it is time for us to have that kind of relationship where it’s all about love and the prrr factor. All right. So, let’s get moving.
I only have one announcement. One announcement this week is Q&A is on Thursday at 12:00 noon. Q&A, this Thursday at 12:00 noon. And I look forward to seeing you then. So, please send in your questions to info@ashlytorian.com. That’s info@ashlytorian.com, and Ashly has no E, and Torian has only one R. [Laughs] All right. So, Q&A, Thursday. I can’t wait to see you there.
Now, one thing you want to check into today is you have seen the affirmation on the right side, you have seen that quite a bit in this program. That is because I feel it is vitally important for you to step into that belief that you are a strong, healthy, and fit individual that makes wise decisions. You are. And the only way to do that is to start with that thought, the thought that you are strong, “I am strong, I am healthy, I am fit, and I do make wise decisions.” Begin with that thought. What that thought’s going to do, especially when you add the power of inflection and the power of action, in actionable voice and in movement, that will become a feeling in your body, it will produce an emotion. And when that produces an emotion, that transitions your whole physiology from one of a state of stress, the sympathetic state, to a parasympathetic state, one that is filled with belief, one that is filled with commitment, one that is filled with courage and compassion. And that is where you want to be. That is where you want to live and reside. So, when we fuel ourselves and feed our mind with statements like, “I am strong, I am healthy, I am fit, and I make wise decisions,” that is so true, and that truth will become embedded within you, and you will begin standing firm in knowledge that you are and that is how you show up. Because when you show up this way, that is when you will begin to eat for a strong, healthy, and fit individual. That is when you will begin moving with your exercise program as a strong, healthy, and fit individual, and you will begin living as that person, making decisions as that person. You will begin fueling your mind, your heart, and your emotions according to the person that is strong, healthy, fit, and makes wise decisions. You also bring calm, confidence, and empowerment to not only yourself but to everyone you come into contact with. It’s about being that person as you are getting ready in the morning so that you’re making those decisions about food that are going to energize you, that will bring vitality to your body and your life. That’s what it’s about. It’s eating as that person. Not the person that started the 90-day challenge, you’re not eating as that person anymore. You’re eating as the new person, the person that you’ve transformed into. You’re eating as that person now that eats slow to the point of energy, but you also have created this umbrella of belief that you are strong, healthy, and fit, and you make wise decisions. And that is the persona of you that will carry you through this 90-day challenge and that will also carry you through the rest of your life, living free from your struggle and in a body that is healthy, fit, and strong. Isn’t that wonderful? [Laughs]
It is so beautiful how the mind and body work together when we feed our mind the good stuff. Then, we begin to feel the emotion within us, and that is when we transform. We only transform when we feel the emotion within our body. And that is what today is all about. You will begin to learn how to bring that prrr factor into your life, into your body so that you transform yourself right here, right now. Such a fun and beautiful thing, isn’t it? God just created a wonderful vessel here [Laughs] that just by bringing a thought to our mind and feeling it within ourselves emotionally, that we can actually transform our being, transform ourselves in that moment in less than 60 seconds. In less than 60 seconds. How fun. All right. So, your best is in this moment, on this day. That is what brings you the results you desire. You do your best right here, right now, each and every day. Your best in this moment. And it’s going to carry you through to the next moment, and the next moment, and the next. All right, well… We’ll just wait a moment here. My computer is stuck on a slide. There we go. There we go. I knew it had it in there. Okay, we’re going to make sure I was going in the right direction. Wonderful. Okay. So, let’s talk about pleasure. Don’t you love the fat right here on fire? [Laughs] Do you feel like your metabolism is on fire right now and it is just a fat-burning machine and you are burning it all up? [Laughs] That is what happens when we have transformed our body chemistry by utilizing our emotional energy and producing pleasure. Pleasure is a great metabolic enhancing nutrient. We can bring on pleasure in an instant. The same way we can turn ourselves from a stress state to a non-stress state when we’re about to eat, you can do that same thing with pleasure. Typically, with pleasure, we can just picture something in our mind that brought us pleasure and we can begin to feel it within our body. It can happen that fast with pleasure. It does stimulate fat mobilization, which means you are a fat-burning machine when you are in pleasure. So, there’s nothing better than feeling good and burning fat all at the same time. Now, remember, pleasure chemistry happens when you are in slow, when you’re breathing, when you’re taking in oxygen. And also, pleasure is in the moment. Pleasure is a moment by moment experience. So, when you are in something, whether it is watching children play and have fun, watching your child, or your grandbaby, or a friend’s child that you are very close to, and you’re watching them discover their 10 fingers and 10 toes, the pleasure that that is. The pleasure you experience in your relationship with your significant other, with your spouse. That relationship is so vital, and so important, and so poignant. To just be there in the moment and experience the pleasure of being with them. Taking that time, taking that time to be with your child and receive pleasure from their experiences of what they’re learning in their life. Receiving pleasure from watching a butterfly land on a flower. The pleasure you can receive from watching a hawk fly through the air, or a horse and its baby colt next to it wandering through the pasture. One of my dad’s favorite settings is a pasture filled with cattle. He loves that site and it brings him such pleasure to see it. A rainbow shooting through the sky, arching across the earth. So beautiful. A waterfall at one of your favorite vacation spots. Or it could be where you live. As you’re out walking and you hear a tiny brook trickling nearby, the pleasure that that gives you. The pleasure you receive from feeling strong in your body as you’re exercising. The pleasure you’ll receive as you just sit and be with a person in your life that you love and adore. The pleasure you get when someone gives you kudos and someone gives you accolades for doing something that meant something to them. The pleasure of doing something for someone else, giving them a helping hand, helping the children of M5M. Going on a service trip. Whatever it could be, whatever could bring you pleasure. And I hope I helped fill your mind up with things that bring you pleasure outside of food. When we are in the struggle of an eating behavior, when we are in the struggle of a mindset around food and we run towards food in order to relieve that, we say that we’re getting pleasure from it, but it’s really not a pleasure, it’s a punishment because of how we’re using food. That’s not a place of pleasure, that’s a place of punishment. However, when you can transition and transform your own body chemistry to that of true pleasure and when you’re eating food, any of the new meals that you’ve discovered, or perhaps you have this new recipe for a TruPLENISH smoothie that it just rocks your world [Laughs], that you really love, allow yourself to feel pleasure with the food. It is okay to receive that from food. In fact, it is quite nourishing, and it will transform not only your relationship with food where you will become more wise around food, more responsible, but it will also turn your body chemistry into that fat-burning machine. And that’s what we want. We want to take ourselves from a place of punishment with food to a place of pleasure. Now, you may be asking me, “Ashly, I am doing so good on the TruHealth and I have no cravings whatsoever.” Well, I am so pleased to hear that, that your cravings have subsided, that you are doing so well on this program, and that you are 150% in this. But I am here to tell you that those eating behaviors you have had for the last one, two, three, four, five, six, seven decades are not gone in one month. They’re not. They will come back. They will come back around. And it’s okay that they do. In fact, we welcome them when they do. We welcome the opportunity. When we become punishing with our food, or punishing with our thought patterns around our body, or punishing around anything in our life, we welcome that because it gives us the opportunity to practice pleasure, gives us the opportunity to practice slow, it gives us the opportunity to practice a little bit of compassion and love for ourself. And when you get to practice these elements that you’re learning through this program, you’ll become stronger, you’ll become leaner, you’ll become fitter, you’ll become more vital because you have been given the opportunity to practice. Don’t you just love life? [Laughs] Because it will give you a practice opportunity. [Laughs] So, how is it that we discover pleasure in our life?
So, I’ve got a pleasure activity for you. This is part of it, and it is what does pleasure look like to you. What does it look like? I listed a lot of things on the previous screen of different ways that we can see pleasure and experience pleasure in our life. So, what does that look like to you? Write on a piece of paper right now. Do this. Make sure you screenshot this or take a picture of this with your phone, this screen, so that you can also work on these later. But what does pleasure look like to you, and what does it feel like? Do you feel giddy inside? Do you feel a tickling in your chest? Do you feel like you could just go run, and jump, and play like a 10-year-old kid? Do you feel that childlike zest bubbling up in you when you feel pleasure? What does it feel like? Think back to that last time you felt pleasure. What did you feel in your body? And we want feelings in your body. The reason why I practice this pleasure activity and why I encourage you to practice it as well is because we have become so disconnected from our body. In emotional regulation, we teach people how to feel emotion in their body and to observe it. And as they observe it, that emotion can evolve and go through its emotional lifespan, which is about two to two and a half minutes, and then it will dissipate when we observe emotional disturbances that way. What I have found in this practice is that people have become emotionally disconnected, especially when it comes to their body, and food, and exercise. The reason why is because we have geared ourselves in the last five decades around diet, around restriction, and around, “It is not beneficial for us to love whatever we’re eating, because if we love at it, that means we’re going to overeat.” And that is not what that means. That is not what that means. Just because you love something does not mean you’re going to overeat on it or binge-eat on it. There’s a behavior behind that that needs to be addressed, it’s not the food. The food did not get you in the situation you’re in right now. It’s not food’s fault. It is the behavior or the experience that happened that used that as the issue, as the problem. It used that as the excuse, as the fallback guy. It’s not food itself. And so, we want to reconnect our mind and body, get them in sync together. That’s the reason why we did all of the mindful eating and the eating to the point of energy because we start with food, we change how we appear with food. And when we change how we are with food, it is only then that we can change further in our life, in other experiences. Because how we do food is how we do life. How we show up with food is how we show up in life. How responsible we are in our food life is how responsible we are in the other areas of our life. So, we want to reconnect our mind and body together. So, that’s what you had been doing these past five weeks, is learning how to get the mind, body communicating together again so that you can feel the emotions that you feel. Only then can you really feel what pleasure is like. Now, how often do you experience pleasure? Do you allow yourself to experience it once a day, once a week, once a month, once every six months? I have run into some people, but they could not tell me the last time that they felt pleasure, that they felt a giddiness in their heart. Couldn’t remember the last time. Wow. Allow yourself to feel pleasure in every area of your life, that giddiness, that childlike zest that just wants to come out and play. [Laughs] Now, I want you to discover what triggers pleasure for you. Find out what are those little things that trigger it. Do you find that you have to be quiet and still or do you find you just have to be mono-focused on that one thing? What triggers it for you? Does a sunshiny day all of a sudden just trigger pleasure for you, and you think, “Okay, it’s going to be a great day if the sun’s shining.”? [Laughs] Or maybe for you, “It’s a great day. It’s raining.” What triggers pleasure for you? Any person? Anything in your life, what triggers pleasure? And then, one way to practice pleasure and to begin integrating more pleasure in your life is how can you make your current task more pleasurable. So, let’s say you are paying bills. Typically, people don’t enjoy that. So, how could you make paying bills more pleasurable? What could you do to make it more pleasurable? Turn on your favorite music? Have a different mantra in your mind when you’re paying bills? Have gratitude for each one that you’re paying? What are other ways that you can make a task more pleasurable? When you’re eating your meal, what could you do to make it more pleasurable? Light candles? Eat off of your beautiful china? Drink out of a glass instead of a plastic cup? [Laughs] What can you do to make your relationships more pleasurable? What could you do to make a current relationship more pleasurable? That is a really good one. That is a really good one to spend some time in. How can you make a relationship more pleasurable. Number one, by being all in, all there, all present. Listening makes it more pleasurable. Laughing certainly makes it more pleasurable. Laughing at the silly things. That’s always pleasurable. [Laughs] And then, conversations. How could you make a conversation more pleasurable? And a chore. Folding laundry. How do you make that pleasurable? It’s finding whatever mundane task, or chore, or anything else, your exercise life, your eating life, your work life, your career… How can you make everything that you do more pleasurable? Because the more pleasure you bring into your life, the more pleasure you will feel in your body chemistry, the more fat you are going to burn. Is that not fantastic? The more fat you will burn, the more pleasure you feel, the more fat you burn. That is a major win-win, a major win-win. I say, “Yes. [Laughs] Give me more. Give me more.” All right. So, remember, it is not about being perfect, it’s about effort, it’s about putting forth the next step, just taking the next step. That’s all you have to do, is take the next step. And when you implement that effort into your life every single day, that’s where transformation happens. And that’s what you all are doing on this 90-day challenge. You are experiencing transformation every day because you are taking a step towards true health every single day. Congratulations. So exciting.
Your change is occurring as you speak. You are transforming as you’re sitting there listening to my voice. You are transforming in this moment right here, right now. Just keep going. Just keep going. So, a reminder for you is to practice the mind, body, nutrition tools daily. Get out your notebook. I hope you’re making up a notebook of all of the week’s material. Make up that notebook, look through it. I am a proponent of reading part of it every single day. All of it or part of it, read through it every single day so that it stays top of mind and you know those nutritional tools inside and out, upside and down. Practice them daily. So, breathe often, quiet your mind, and stand firm in your desire for your success. Stand for you. Stand for what you want and you desire in your life. There is nothing in this world that is worth you sabotaging yourself in this effort to live healthy, and strong, and fit, and a person that makes wise decisions around food and exercise all the time. There is nothing in the world that is more important than that, and the reason why is because of this. If you do not take care of yourself, you cannot take care of the loved ones in your life. It is only when you are in a place of strength, and vitality, and good health that you can care for your loved ones and be the person that they need in their life. That’s the only way you can serve them. Taking care of you, to breathe often, to quiet your mind, quiet your mind, and allow, allow yourself to just be so that you can receive pleasure in your life. Yes, and stand firm in all your desires. Yes. I hope you have a fantastic week, a fantastic week. Just remember, you’ve got this. You do, you have this. You are a strong, healthy, and fit individual, who makes wise decisions, who brings calm, confidence, and empowerment to not only yourself but to all of those that you meet and come into contact with. I am celebrating all that you have done, and all that you are doing, and all that is to come for you.
I’m so excited. All right. Stay tuned for more to come. We will have Q&A later this week. And also, I will be getting out more information to you on Facebook. Stay tuned for that, and I look forward to seeing you next time.
Recorded and current as of February 11, 2019
Always consult with your physician or other qualified healthcare provider before embarking on a new diet or program. This program is not recommended for pregnant or lactating women. If you are taking medications, have a health condition or are planning a medical procedure, consult your health professional before beginning this program. It is also not recommended for children under the age of 18. If you have any specific questions about these matters, you should consult your doctor or other healthcare provider.